I want to share some profound well thought words with you…

And I really would want to just that, but I seem to have a constant lack of time on my hand.

I will assume that you all know I have an autistic disorder, but how this effect my time management is something I never have written about so let’s change that.

When you see me work on a project, writing something or mater a fact any activity I do, you would never think of me being a “special” person.

But when you look just a little better you will notice that I do only one thing and very focused that is,

Little thingy on the side: for I am “good” in the things I do otherwise I will probably not start doing them, test are saying that I have more than enough cognitive abilities (they even suggest I’m smart) only I need them to survive this non autistic world so much that despite of all my headroom I’m unable to live on my own without some coaching from some professionals, which I by the way don’t mind, I need them and they are there so I use their support. So having a higher IQ and autism does not equal better able to live in a “social environment” non-autistic world.

but I really suck at switching between things, this costs me huge amounts of time and makes me even slow.

What do I mean with switching, this is not only let’s say switching from computer work to making dinner, but is much more like switching from writing this post to checking my mail or answering a phone call and during the phone call talking on multiple subjects, each time another subject comes up from my side there is no problem for it is the natural flow of my brain workings but when the other person goes to another subject I have to switch for my brain remains stuck with the previous subject, often even after the next one is already over (this is especially tiresome and visible when I have to engage in small talk).

When I go from one physical activity to another I first have to shut the previous activity down (you could say even morn on the fact that I have to stop) before I can start another physical activity.

This is so big and time-consuming that often I have to fit another masking/bypass activity in between so I can speed it up, like going to the bathroom while I actually don’t have to go, or pick up a glass and take a sip of water from the tap in the kitchen (easy, short and often repetitive activities that cost little thought process) these shorten the time needed to allow me to stop one activity, starting the new one is often not really the problem the stopping seems to pose the bigger problem.

So when I’m watching some TV and have to go make lunch, I will often first go to the bathroom and only then am I able to make lunch, when I wouldn’t do it that way I have to turn the TV off switch my TV watching thought process off and start getting ready to get up to go to the kitchen to make lunch this could easily take several minutes.

So the in-between activity frees my mind up so I can do something else, only I have to watch out I do not start something completely different like checking my mail, for my mind was freed from the last occupation which was partly disturbed by the need to do something else but that need was shut down as well.

But now to why I started this post altogether: I know I live on benefits, for my autism makes me unable to have/keep a job. That should give me plenty of time to do whatever I like and spent so much time on hobby’s, projects, etc… but somehow I’m unable to do them as fast as I would like them go.

I know it is my switching issue that prevents me from going any faster, where I see people with jobs and families easily read more books, write more text (blogs/tweets/websites/books), workout and spent time crafting things as a hobby.

And I struggle to get the things I want to do, although I am a perfectionist so I will accept less sloppy results than others seem to do, and do them in a timeframe that seems reasonable to me.

I’m working on several thing at the moment, let’s sum them up:

•  Writing posts for my blog. (want to post at least once a week for now)
• Getting the content sorted for my website. (even if it is in Dutch first)
• Fine-tune the design and programming of the website.
• Crafting my first Steampunk jewellery piece.
• Making a photo/video diary on the crafting progress besides/including the blog posts.
• Running (at the moment 3 times a week on a build-up schedule to be able to run 5km = 3,2 miles)
• Sleep, eat, drink, cook, keeping house and myself clean.
• Go to the shopping centre to buy my groceries.
• keeping up with my feeds (news/twitter/blogs/…) as I understand only a fraction what others are able to take in.

For example this post took me more than two hours to write.
But it is good for me to do more than one thing for when I would completely focus on building my website, it will likely become an obsessive behaviour and I could get in to trouble because I am unable to stop to go to bed or even when I go to bed I cannot stop my mind going on and so unable to sleep.

To prevent that from happening I force myself to do that, where I suck at the most and that is to switch between the different things I want to do.

Note: I hope this text has somewhat of a head, middle and tail (although I believe the last one is gone a little missing) to be called a story or post, and that the story itself makes some sense, it will not be the first time one or more of these things is omitted in something I write, baffling the ones I asked to read it.

I don’t even know if anybody will be reading this one, but if you do and have any questions or remarks don’t hesitate to post them or e-mail them, for only then will I know how to improve my writings and that is something I really, really want. This doesn’t mean I will mindlessly accept all that is written in your comments, I will read them and when I think they are baring ground, then I will decide what to do with this new-found knowledge.

Oh, I got a little update on my Steampunk crafting as well,

Here is a photo from the first stage of building the 20 something pistons.

Got frustrated when I was building the first few for I first closed the back of the piston and then tried to solder the ring on the piston rod that of course kept moving and just didn’t wanted to be soldered to the ring.Had to stop doing it and pounder a little how to solve this it took me 2 days for the simple answer.First stabilise the rod by putting a fixture in the piston then solder the ring to the rod, remove the fixture and solder the back end of the piston in place.(so steps 4 and 5 in opposite order)Damn it’s always the simple solutions that seem to come hard by. Now finding enough peace of mind to restart crafting again, maybe tomorrow.